Cookie Monday

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Cookie Monday.

Because, honestly… Mondays. Ugh. Today was an alarm goes off, I turn it off, roll over and promptly ignore it while carrying on a ridiculous conversation with myself about why I should get up morning. Or not. Not won and I spent and extra half an hour in bed. I am SO ready for this time change, I do not relish getting up in the pitch blackness of ugh.

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At least if you have cookies, Mondays are slightly better. Not that I have these, mind you, I made them last Wednesday and they were eaten in… six hours.

Yeahhh. Hello small batches and starving post-spin class family, bye bye cookies! At least they were a decent post-spin meal, what with having good fats and being refined sugar free and all that. You know, business as usual around here in the hippie natural food universe…

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Also. My lovely neighbors dropped off a bag of pomegranates and they’re GORGEOUS so I’m including photos for your fall pleasure. This is my favorite time of year!

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So now it’s Monday and I’m tragically cookie-free, but lucky for you, I hand deliver cookies to your inbox! Happy Monday, even if they’re virtual. Toddle off into your kitchen and you can have these for yourself in less than half an hour, which would a) make your Monday better, b) prevent bart strike angst by giving yourself something far more productive than work to do (who needs to commute, anyway?), and c) give your body what it wants while tricking your brain into thinking you’re eating something decadent. Everybody (stomach gremlins included) wins!

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Two types of cookies for you today: I made a half batch of each since I couldn’t decide which one I wanted to make more. Life is full of such complicated decisions…

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Quinoa Date Cookies

Lightly sweet, chewy, and thick. These are delicious warm or room temp, and if you make a half batch as I did, you should come out with about 8. Gluten free and refined sugar free. As posted, this makes 8 cookies—double for a full batch! Recipe only slightly adapted from Sweetest Kitchen, here!

  • 1/2 c sprouted quinoa flour
  • 1/4 tsp baking soda
  • 3/4 tsp organic cornstarch
  • 1/8 tsp salt
  • 1/2 c dates, pitted
  • 1/8 c coconut oil
  • 1 egg white
  • 1/2 tsp vanilla extract
  • 1-2 squares super dark chocolate, chopped

Preheat oven to 350, and line a baking sheet with parchment paper.

In a medium bowl, whisk together quinoa flour, baking soda, cornstarch, and salt. Using a food processor (or alternatively an immersion blender—-this is what I did as I didn’t feel like doing extra dishes, but it works slightly less well), puree dates. Add in coconut oil, egg white, and vanilla, and stir to combine. Add wet into dry, and stir in chocolate pieces. The dough will initially seem dry, but keep stirring and it’ll incorporate. Drop by the spoonful onto your prepared cookie sheet and flatten slightly. Bake for about 10 minutes, until firm to the touch and slightly browned.

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Almond Butter Pumpkin Cookies

Mine came out very soft and flat, with a bit of a gooey consistency (likely the result of too much flax egg, but I don’t care—they were delicious!). Gluten free, vegan, and refined sugar free. Wheeee! Again, I made a half batch of 7 cookies. Double for more! Recipe from the awesome blog Mangia, here!

  • 1/4 c pumpkin puree
  • 1/8 c maple syrup (I use organic grade B)
  • 1/4 c unsalted almond butter
  • 1/2 tbsp ground flaxseed+1.5 tbsp water (1/2 a flax egg)
  • 1/4 tsp (runneth over) vanilla extract
  • 1 tbsp almond flour
  • 1 tbsp coconut flour
  • 3/4 tsp pumpkin pie spice
  • 1/4 tsp baking soda
  • 1-2 squares dark chocolate, chopped (I used a mexican stone ground vanilla chocolate, so delicious)

Preheat oven to 350 and line a baking sheet with parchment paper. Combine flax and water and let sit aside.

In a mediumish bowl, stir together pumpkin puree, maple, almond butter, flax egg, and vanilla. In another smallish bowl, whisk together almond flour, coconut flour, spice, and baking soda. Dump dry into wet and stir to combine (cookies are maybe like the most wonderful, easiest thing ever), toss in chopped chocolate, and drop by the spoonful onto your cookie sheet. Bake for 10-13 minutes—I checked mine at 10, but let them go closer to 13. Let cool on the cookie sheet for a few minute (almond flour is delicate), then remove to a cooling rack.

I’m sure these store well, but I had absolutely no opportunity to test this as they disappeared the day I made them. Ah well, cookies are best fresh ;)

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Cookies that play nice in the sandbox

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OoOooOOOOooohhhh the first of the fall baking has arrived!

PUMPKIN.

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Why isn’t it a year-round thing?? I always think that summer fruit is my favorite thing, but then around comes fall (which happens to be my favorite season anyway) and I get all obsessed with pumpkin. So fickle.

But seriously. Pumpkin is one of my favorite things ever. And healthy cookies are right up there next to pumpkin on the favorite things list, so obviously why would I NOT combine these?! Helloooo.

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I’m going to start my pumpkin hoarding sometime soon…. you know what I mean if you’ve hung around my inbox snark the last several years: come fall, everyyytime I go to the store, I grab an extra can of pumpkin. Can never have too much, right?! … Right. Sorry. I have a problem. BUT. That also means that when everyone else is fighting over the *last* can of pumpkin within a 10 mile radius, I am sitting pretty on my hoarded stash. And can therefore make pumpkin things. All. The. Time. Yep. Be jealous. Or don’t, and implement my genius strategy for yourself… you’ll thank me later.

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These cookies play nice in the sandbox, too, as they’re dairy free, refined sugar free, gluten free, and paleo. Even if you don’t subscribe to any particular dietary theory (like me. I’m an omnitarian), it’s only fair to make cookies that can make nice for other people too, right?! Cookies are meant to be shared. They’re like love, in food form.

Bake love. Share food (preferably with a bestie over tea). Eat. Be happy!

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Pumpkin Cookies

Recipe lightly adapted from Lexi’s Clean Kitchen, here! My batch yielded 10 cookies, about 2.5-3″. Paleo, gluten free, refined sugar free, and dairy free! Not to mention full of beta carotene, healthy fats, and antioxidants. How could you pass up these little gems?! That’s right… I thought not!

  • 1 c almond flour/almond meal
  • 1 tbsp coconut flour
  • 1 egg
  • 1 tbsp refined coconut oil, melted
  • 1/4 c pumpkin puree (Just pumpkin, not pie filling pleeease!)
  • 2.5 tbsp raw honey
  • 1 tsp vanilla extract
  • 1/8 tsp sea salt
  • 1/4 tsp baking soda
  • heaping 1/4 tsp pumpkin pie spice (I make my own: 1 tbsp cinnamon, 2 tsp ground ginger, 1/2 tsp ground cloves, 1/2 tsp allspice, 1/2 tsp nutmeg, pinch of cardamom or mace), plus more to sprinkle on the top of yet-to-be-baked cookies
  • 2 large squares of 70% dark chocolate, roughly chopped

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Preheat oven to 350, and line a baking sheet with parchment paper.

Whisk together almond flour, coconut flour, sea salt, baking soda and 1/4 tsp pumpkin pie spice. In a smaller bowl, whisk together melted coconut oil, pumpkin, honey, and vanilla. Stir wet into dry (and do try to avoid overmixing, we can’t have that…). Stir in chocolate, and drop by the tablespoonish onto the prepared baking sheet. Sprinkleysprinkle some extra pumpkin pie spice on there because that is an excellent idea. Smooth them out just a little… then pop them into the oven for about 15 minutes.

Let cool on the cookie sheet for a few as they’re soft right out of the oven—they’ll seem too soft at first but they firm up nicely. Store them in the fridge, if they last that long!

Your kitchen will smell like heaven. Indulge responsibly ;)

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Fig Newtons don’t have figs in them… do they?!

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I’m pretty sure everyone has a fig newton memory.

Not necessarily a good one, mind you, but I’m sure there’s at least one stored away in those memory banks. Mine happen to be a positive ones… I looooved those little figgy cookies growing up. I liked to eat around the cakey outside first, and then eat the middle with tiny little nibbles (Strangely enough I did that with Madeline cookies too, I see a trend here?!). But probably if you’d have asked me if I liked figs, I would have turned my nose up in an unbridled look of disgust. Because I did I associate figs with fig newtons? Absolutely not. Does a fresh fig taste like the interior of a fig newton? Um… no.

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Luckily for me, liking figs had nothing to do with liking fig newtons. I was fairly well supplied with fig newtons as a child, and even into college when I became obsessed with the Whole Foods version of “healthier” figgy bars (and my mom would nicely send a box of them in my freshman care packages). I’m pretty sure I hadn’t eaten a real fig until I was (gasp) OUT of college. Whoops. Definitely didn’t do that on purpose. Hey, in my defense, I didn’t cross paths with figs very often (until now).

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Oh fig newtons, how full of processed crap you are! I want to like them from a nostalgic point of view, but seriously?! I tried a bite of one a while ago and almost spat it out. Fact: they taste like cardboard. Thanks, five kinds of corn syrup… you might enable these to last through the apocalypse, but you can’t make them taste like food! Oh wait. That’s right, they’re a food product, not a food.

BUT!

Lucky for you. THESE taste even better than a fig newton AND they’re made from real food and things you can pronounce. Wheeee!

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Vegan Figgy Bars

I got about 20 little bars out of this, that were slightly bigger than a conventional fig newton. Vegan, refined sugar free, and gluten free. What’s not to like? Oh and right, they’re delicious. Recipe slightly adapted from The Iron You, here!

  • 1.25 c almond flour
  • 1/4 tsp sea salt
  • 1/4+1/8 c maple syrup
  • 1/8 c refined coconut oil, melted
  • 1/2 tbsp vanilla extract
  • 1/2 c (a good handful) dried figs*
  • 1/8 c lemon juice
  • 2 dates, chopped
  • 1 tbsp peach jam**
  • 1/2 tbsp vanilla extract

*my figs were SO dry, they were like small pebbles. I reconstituted them in a bit of boiling water for about 10 minutes, which made them soft enough not to kill my food processor.

**mine was flat peach, raspberry and vanilla (freaking delicious), courtesy of Anna!! Her blog is over here.

In a largeish bowl, combine almond flour and salt. In a slightly smaller bowl, stir together maple syrup, melted coconut oil, and vanilla extract. Add wet ingredients to dry, and stir until combined. The batter will be super runny, which is okay! Cover the bowl and pop it into the fridge for at least an hour, to let it solidify a bit.

In the bowl of your food processor, process figs until they’re more like a chunky paste. Add in lemon juice, dates, jam, and vanilla, and blend until combined. I tasted mine a few times along the way and adjusted as I went. Set the filling aside until the dough is done.

Preheat oven to 350, and line a baking sheet with parchment paper. Using two separate sheets of parchment, roll out the dough to about 1/4″ thickness. Use a knife to divide it into two roughly even rectangles, then spread the filling down the dough, slightly off center so there is enough dough to cover it back up. Use the parchment paper to roll the dough back over the filling, pressing the edges and the ends together to seal it off. Make them look pretty by smoothing with your fingers (you’re all alone in the kitchen, who’s to see?!)… then pop them into the oven for about 20-25 minutes, until they begin to brown. They should feel slightly firm to the touch in the center when they’re done. Let cool on the baking sheet before moving them, as they’re slightly delicate before they’re cooled. These keep best in the fridge!

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Out of coconut?! What? No. This is a travesty.

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So yeah. You remember that day that I made the roti flatbread? Right.

I made cookies that day too! [I had a very productive day]

And guess how long it took us to eat all of that delicious carby goodness?

Yep. Like six hours.

Let me see… I made roti around 11… and they were gone by 12:30. And then I made the cookies around 11:30 and they were gone by 8 pm. Okay okay so more like 8 hours but do you see my point?! Delicious. Granted, there were four of us and I made half batches due to lack of coconut, but even so. Impressive, wouldn’t you say?

Besides, these are good for me so obviously this is an excuse to make them again…

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Sweet Potato Coconut-Almond Cookies

Recipe lightly adapted from the legit blog Mangia!, here! I made a half batch and got 11 cookies, but I’ll post the full recipe here. These are deeelicious. Healthy fats, beta carotene, and whole grains. Winner, winner.

  • 2 flax eggs (2 tbsp+6 tbsp water)
  • 1 sweet potato, mashed (I microwaved mine, laaaazy)
  • 1/2 c unsalted almond butter
  • 2 tbsp coconut oil, melted
  • 3 tbsp maple syrup (I use grade B)
  • 1 tsp vanilla extract
  • 1/2 c almond flour
  • 1.5 c rolled oats
  • 1/2 c whole wheat pastry flour
  • 1/2 tsp baking powder
  • 1/2 tsp baking soda
  • 1/2 tsp salt
  • 1/2 tsp cinnamon
  • 1/2 c unsweetened, shredded coconut\

Preheat oven to 350, and line a baking sheet with parchment paper.

Make your flax eggs and set them aside to gel. In a smallish bowl, combine mashed sweet potato, almond butter, coconut oil, maple, and vanilla: stir until just combined. In a larger bowl, whisk together almond flour, oats, flour, baking powder and soda, salt, cinnamon, and coconut. Pour wet into dry, and stir until the batter is incorporated (I added a tablespoon or two of water to help it all come together). Drop dough by the spoonful onto the prepared baking sheet, and flatten slightly. Bake for 11-12 minutes (Mine were done perfectly at 11, with slightly golden tops). Let cool on the sheet for a few minutes before moving to a cooling rack!

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Happy Earth Day! Go show Mother Nature some love.

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Okay so actually it’s been about a million years since I made these, but they were too good not to share! So better late than never, riiiiight?

You see, I’ve been mega busy doing awesome things like finding this:

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And being up at dawn to witness this (Happy Earth Day today, by the way! Go out and give a tree some love):

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Oh. And I spend an inordinate amount of time here. Whole wheat croissant+jasmine green tea = heaven.

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And doing other things like attempting to eat as much as I possibly can, whilst being off sugar (yep, that happened. Including dates! Amazing, I know. I’ve added dates back in now, but expect to see natural, non-refined sweeteners on here from now on in baked treats). Trust me though, I feel quite a bit better for having cut processed sugar out nearly completely (special occasions not withstanding! Birthdays. Duhhh).

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Busy busy busy.

But don’t worry, still eating ridiculous hippie-type things like eggy pumpkin messes and a mega huge ton of veggies. As per usual, nothing has particularly changed! Except maybe the consumption of avocado and liquid aminos and nutritional yeast has gone up… not that I even remotely thought that first one was even possible! Ha. Power to the AVO!! I’m sure another savory recipe is coming your way soon, watch this space for further developments!

But anyway. Cookies. Long time coming, I made these a few weeks back and they were simple, delicious, and good for you. What’s not to love?

And yes, I know they’re blue. Who *doesn’t* like some blue food now and again?! Especially when it’s naturally occurring… see? It’s kind of like mother nature is throwing a party for you, on your plate. A party of awesome, antioxidant-filled blueness. To which the free radicals in your body are NOT invited, by the way (and after you eat these cookies/blueberries, there will be less nasty free radicals to float around and cause problems anyway! Mother Nature always knows how to throw an awesome party).

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Blueberry Almond Coconut Cookies

Yield: about 11-12, mine spread out quite a bit and were on the flatter side. Soft, but delicious. Recipe lightly adapted from Ari’s Menu, here!

Healthy fats [almonds+coconut], antioxidants [blueberries], vegan, and gluten free! Winners all around.

  • 1.5 c almond meal
  • 1/4 tsp baking soda
  • 1 tbsp organic, non GMO cornstarch
  • dash of salt
  • 1/4 c maple syrup (I use grade B organic)
  • 1/3 c light coconut milk (canned)
  • 1 tsp vanilla extract
  • 1/2 c frozen organic blueberries

Preheat the oven to 375, and line a baking sheet with parchment paper.

In a large bowl, combine almond meal, baking soda, cornstarch, and salt. Add maple, coconut milk, and vanilla, and stir to combine. Gently fold in blueberries (this turns the batter blue. I’m in love). Drop by the spoonful onto your prepared cookie sheet, and bake for 12-14 minutes until set and golden (Mine went a little on the longer side—they’ll still be soft when done, so tap the tops to test them). Let sit for a few minutes (they’re delicate!), then remove to a cooling rack to cool completely. Store in an airtight container in the fridge.

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A whoopsa-too-much-milk almost-fail that wasn’t

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YOU. GUYS.

These cookies are… maybe the best thing I’ve eaten all week. And I really have been eating them all week (whatever, I know it’s Tuesday, my weeks are never normal so be nice to me and just assume I mean last week+the beginning of this week, okay good, now we’re straightened out… continuing on!), since I’ve made two batches. TWO. You know something is pretty freakin’ amazing if I make it twice. Not only twice, but IN. A. ROW.

Whaaaat.

Weird.

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Obviously you should trot off to your kitchen and make these immediately. Not only are these crazy delicious, but they also happen to be ridiculously good for you (okay. It’s still a cookie but if you are a fiend for cookies like me, you can be awesome and healthify when you can) and beyond simple to make. Toss some stuff in a food processor, push on. Push off. Toss in some more stuff. Blend. Stop blending. Add the last bit. On. Off. Throw on cookies sheet. Toss sheet in oven. Bip. Done! …Pause for baking. Attempt to let them “cool”. Do a bunch of push ups (okayyy, I suppose that bit is optional) Stuff face. Repeat.

It’s nice if you share. Or you can share with a caveat, like me, and make some slightly-more-massive ones for yourself and clearly separate them on the cooling rack. With a fork. See? Those two over there are on the “do not eat under penalty of mega cookie deprived wrath” side of the fork. The others are obviously fair game, but I never said I wouldn’t eat those too. Oh no.

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And yes… I know this is about my billionth cookie post in pretty much two weeks, *sighhhh*. Sooner rather than later I’ll get around to blogging about something else, but suffice it to say I a) about eat my weight in veggies everyday, b) I eat lots of cookies and c) my dinners have been quick, nutritious, and visually uninspiring these days. Sooo. Savory things. Eventually.

But right now… go make these cookies!! Seriously. I love you, invisible internet friends, would I steer you wrong?! … Correct answer: no. Cue subliminal messaging: coooooookiiiieeeesssss!!!

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Ridiculously Delicious Date Cookies

Recipe from Power Hungry, here! I got around 17-18 cookies each time.

The first time I totally goofed and doubled the milk. I do have to say, they are delicious that way and I think I might actually prefer them. I’ve made them twice, as I said, once with the goof and once as the recipe originally intended. While I love both, I think my vote is with the softer, flatter (for once!) doubled-milk variety. The original amount of milk yields a taller, slightly craggier cookie, with slightly chewier edges. Both are delicious. These cookies contain minimally processed ingredients and no refined sugar! They’re full of healthy fats (almond butter) and whole grains (oats), fiber (oats+flaxseed), omega-3’s (Flax), and antioxidants (dark chocolate!). Winner, winner, I just ate cookies for dinner. Juuuuust kidding… but seriously. It was a close call.

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Just for comparison, the cookies above are made with 1/2 c milk… and the ones in the eggplant bowl and at the end of the post are 1 c. Just in case you needed a visual like I always do.

Firstly, grab this:

  • 1 c rolled oats
  • 2 tbsp ground flaxseed
  • 1/2 tsp baking soda
  • 1 c semi-packed, pitted dates, roughly chopped
  • 1/2 c organic almond butter
  • 1/2-1 c milk bev (I used 1% milk)*
  • 1 tsp vanilla extract
  • 1/4 c dark chocolate chips

*depending on whether you want taller, chewier cookies (1/2 c), or flatter, softer cookies (1 c)

Secondly, do this:

Preheat the oven to 350 and line a cookie sheet (or two) with parchment paper.

Haul out your massively heavy food processor, and process oats until they are finely ground and flourlike. Add in flaxseed meal and pulse to combine. Add the dates, and pulse until they are finely chopped and incorporated. Toss in almond butter, milk and vanilla, and pulse to blend. Pour/spoon dough into a bowl and stir in chocolate chips. If you double the milk, the mixture will be more like batter than dough (It’ll spoon into little puddles). If you use 1/2 c milk, the dough will be much thicker– flatten the cookies out with a fork before baking. Bake for 10-11 minutes, let cool a few minutes on the cookie sheet (a bit more for the doubled-milk cookies, as they’re a little more delicate), then transfer to a cooling rack. I keep mine in the fridge for freshness. I’m sure they keep for a while, but honestly mine have lasted all of about three days… so good luck with that!

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I really do actually eat vegetables. Promise!

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And now for something completely different in the cookie realm!

Because obviously I haven’t given you nearly enough cookie recipes lately (um. lies?!) And because I’m pretty sure said no one ever there’s such a thing as too many cookies. And if they did, whatever, we obviously can’t be friends. Schaaaawwrryyy! Cookies are the number one principle of my personal philosophy. Life is sometimes tricky, it’s better if you eat a [healthyishkindasortamaybe] cookie!

I think cookies might actually be one of my favorite things to make. Oh really, you say? As if the blog title alone doesn’t prove that!

Cookies on cookies on cookies. One would think this is all I eat…

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Um. I promise I eat vegetables! Like, I actually eat a ridiculous  amount of vegetables. And fruit. And eggs. Ask my mother, she claims it’s difficult to keep me in vegetables… I just… LOVE… SPINACH! Hoooomg. Among other things. I’ve gotten really good at putting spinach where it doesn’t necessarily belong but is undeniably delicious. Like maybe in the banana scramble I made today. So bizarrely wonderful and so perfect for St. Patrick’s day. Hmm. Shield your eyes if you abhor green things, that just might be the next post.

SO anyway. Cookies. Best eaten any time of day, with or without a milk-type beverage.. Eat three, and call me in the morning. Seriously, if medical practitioners gave out this kind of advice, I think the world might be a slightly more magical place.

So now instead of cruncy-hippie-granola raw cookies, you get [somewhat less crunchy but still kind of, whatever I’m still kind of granola] vegan salted caramel chocolate chip cookies! Cue yummy sound. Did I just make the yummy sound? … No. That was definitely you. Oh no? Well.. if it wasn’t *YOU*, and it wasn’t *YOU*… and it wasn’t *ME*…

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Vegan Salted Caramel Chocolate Chip Cookies

Recipe unintentionally adapted from Keepin’ it Kind. I made biggish cookies and ended up with about 15 or 16, but depending on size you could conceivably make up to 24ish… if you use a smaller scooping technique. Don’t judge, I’m rather a fan of large cookies! These are fab cookies, and the dough is just as good (number one perk for vegan baking: dough eating adventures).

I didn’t have coconut sugar, though next time I’ll be using that as my caramel wasn’t quite what was intended visually. It got the point across though, and tasted amazing! That being said… you *can* make these with regular sugar, as I did, but coconut is preferred (and keeps them slightly less refined).

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Let’s make tasty things:

  • 3/4 c sugar (see above note)
  • 1/2 c water
  • 1 c full-fat coconut milk
  • 1/2 tsp sea salt
  • 1 large ripe banana, mashed
  • 1 tbsp coconut oil (mine is the unrefined variety that smells like coconut)
  • 1 tsp vanilla extract
  • 1.5 c whole wheat pastry flour
  • 1 flax egg (1 tbsp ground flaxseed+3 tbsp water)
  • 1/2 tsp baking soda
  • 1/4 tsp sea salt
  • 1/3 c dark chocolate chippies

To do so, we…

Make caramel!
Pour sugar and water into a smallish saucepan. Whisking frequently, bring it to a boil. Reduce heat to low/simmering, and let it reduce until the water is reduced by half. If you use coconut sugar, the water should be dark brown; if using regular sugar, it’ll be lighter in color. Keep whisking, as it has a tendency to bubble up. Slowly whisk in coconut milk and continue whisking for 10-15 minutes or until (if using coconut sugar) the mixture thickens and is a dark brown. If you’re like me and you attempted regular sugar, it’ll look grey. Not the most gorgeous color, but delicious. Promise. The mixture will thicken as it cooks, more so with coconut sugar than regular. Stir in the salt, and remove from heat. Let it cool while you do the rest of the cookies, or you can store the caramel in a jar in the fridge (it keeps for several weeks, tightly sealed).

Onward! Cookie time:

Mix up your flax egg and let it sit for a bit to thicken.
Mash up the banana, toss in slightly meltedish coconut oil, and use a mixer to beat until fluffy. Whisk in vanilla extract and 2/3 c caramel sauce (save the rest for later). Once the flax egg sets up, whisk that in.

In a larger bowl, whisk together flour, baking soda, salt. Add dry ingredients to wet, stirring until just combined. Fold in chocolate chips, and slightly flatten the dough into the bottom of your bowl. Pop it into the fridge and let it chill for about a half and hour.

Preheat the oven to 350, and line two baking sheets with parchment paper.

Remove the dough from the fridge and make several cuts through it with a knife. Drizzle the caramel sauce over the dough, without mixing it in. Drop blobs of dough onto the prepared cookie sheets (whatever size you deem necessary for that particular day…), leaving the streaks of caramel running throughout. The dough will be a bit wet with all that, but just roll with it. Bake cookies for 8-12 minutes (I know that’s a huge range, but I did mine on convection so they ended up going a bit longer. Check at 8, and go from there!) Because of the caramel, the cookies can look a bit underdone, but they should be solid to the touch when done—check the bottoms if you’re not sure. Let cool on the baking sheets for a few minutes, and then transfer to wire rack.

Do yourself a favor and eat one warm out of the oven!

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Did British cavemen eat english muffins? If not, I refuse to be Paleo

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Sorry sorry for the blogging fail, I’ve been busy!! But to make up for all that, I have two wildly different cookie recipes to share with you. Never fear, all is right with the world when we have cookies.

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Hmm, some random musings first.

First and most importantly, I’m now a qualified TRX suspension trainer! Wheeeee!!! Now (after I practice forever and ever), I am certified to officially kick butt. I need business cards now, clearly. Get ready, world, I’m now certified and dangerous.

On a gastronomical level, I tried Welsh Rarebit for the first time when Mutti and I ventured down to Carmel by the Sea for the day. It’s… interesting. And no, it has nothing to do with rabbit, thank goodness. This, however was fantastic. How can you not love caramel and chocolate?!

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And then there is this enviously adorable picture of our feet on the beach.

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And then this awesome thingy that I can now do with my phone! Ridiculous photo editing triumphs! Totally unnecessary but hey, I love glitter so don’t judge.

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Okay so I suppose now I’ll share the cookies… because I spent 8 hours in TRX training, so obviously I earned a cookie (or a million. I was SO. HUNGRY). These cookies are amazing! Raw, vegan, and full of good things for you. No added or refined sugars, and they’re even gluten free! I’m kind of on a raw-date-nut-I’m-really-hippie-crunchy-to-the-core cookies, can you tell? These might even be paleo, maybe? I’m not sure, as I really like cheese and am not in fact well versed in the caveman diet as apparently cavemen didn’t eat cheese. Or english muffins. Maybe British cavemen ate english muffins? Whatever. To each his or her own eating proclivities, if you’re paleo, make these! If you’re not… make them anyway! Love food. Eat!

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Raw Chocolate Chip Cookies

I only slightly modified the recipe from The Sweet Life. Soooo good. I got 11 cookies out of mine, with a tiny ball of ‘dough’ left over to eat whilst making… These cookies come together in a snap, and set up easily in the fridge. Raw, vegan, gluten free, paleo, no refined sugars, no added sugars, good protein, and healthy fats. Um… you could go wrong how?!

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Firstly, you need:

  • 1/2 c dates, pitted puuuuhlease
  • 1.5 c raw walnuts
  • 1/2 c raw pecans
  • 1/4 c unsalted organic almond butter
  • 1/4 c rolled oats
  • pinch of sea salt
  • 1/4 tsp cinnamon
  • 1 tsp vanilla extract
  • small handful of dark chocolate chips

Secondly, do this:

Pit your dates. Please. Don’t murder your food processor…Process the dates (with maybe a teeny bit of water), until they’re smooth and form a bit of a paste. Add walnuts and pecans, and pulse again until smooth and slightly crumbly. Add in almond butter, oats, salt, cinnamon, and vanilla, and blend until smoothyish. The ‘dough’ should be crumbly but hold together when you press a bit between your fingers. If it needs a bit more sticking-together-power, add a tsp of water at a time until you get the consistency you want. Toss the dough out into a bowl, fold in chocolate chippies, and form it into balls or cookies or whatever (I like cookies with a fork pattern). Let set in the fridge for about an hour, and then consume with reckless abandon. I let mine sit on a plate for a bit, uncovered, then put them into a glass container.

Eat, in a wholly guilt-free and smartly indulgent manner. Eat the food you love… love the food you eat!

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Goodbye, moderation, hellooooo ice cream

Thursday things.

1. Apparently I make an excellent napping place:

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2. You know that Oscar Wilde quote I always toss around, “Everything in moderation, including moderation”…? Yeahhhhh. About that moderation thing. Out the window it went on Tuesday when I went to Fenton’s and ate this food coma-inducing wonder. Luckily I split it with Vacuum Vati or else I might be dead by now, ha. This was moderation in moderation in action:

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and then.

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muahahhaha.

3. And then last week I ate this: bourbon cornflake ice cream with bourbon caramel and tahitian vanilla ice cream with slivered, sweetened almonds. Thank you, Humphrey Slocombe, for sending me to gastronomical heaven.

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4. AVO!!! I made paleo cookies to use up the last of my coconut flour. They were… ehh. As much as I love coconut, I just can’t get past the sucks-all-the-moisture-out-of-your-mouth grittiness of coconut flour. It’s okay… but ehhhhh is really how I feel about it.

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5. I really like architecture. Juuuuust saying. Neo gothic seems to find me everywhere after my thesis, but I can’t say I’m sorry: it’s like finding an old friend wherever I go!

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6. OHMYGOSH. I made the ehhh paleo cookies. AND THEN. I made… these. They’re amazing and amazing for you. Make them. (Just as long as you’re not allergic to nuts please). I want them for second breakfast since it’s nine and I’ve had eggs and spinach already. Time for cookies, obviously…

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7. One last thing. Um… Downton Abbey?! Helloooo, what a horrible way to end the season. Couldn’t we have just had a nice ending to the SERIES, with everyone all happy and whatnot? Jeez. At least my favorite Machiavellian meddler is still alive and sarcastically kicking—I’d seriously have to quit watching the show if Maggie Smith left. I think I now have sympathetic post-partum depression. Ugh. At least Mad Men is starting up again in April (!!!)… I’ll attempt to fill the gaps between wildly addicting tv shows somehow… more baking perhaps?!

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Chocolate-Date Almond Butter Cookies (No Bake)

The recipe is from Vegetarian Ventures, here! Sooo glad I came across it, these are freaking amazing. Especially with date caramel on top! You can never have too many dates. These cookies are raw, no bake, and vegan (and gluten free!). They’re full of healthy fats, good protein, and antioxidants… annnndddd all they have is natural sugars! No added or refined anything, which means they’re a snack/breakfast/dessert you can eat and love! I got 11 2″ish cookies.

Whatcha need:

  • 1/2 c raw pecans
  • 1/2 c raw almonds (mine were already partly ground)
  • 1 c dates, pitted and soaked in water for about 15 minutes
  • 1/2 c unsalted organic almond butter (I used Maranatha)
  • 1 oz of dark chocolate, melted
  • 1/2 tsp cinnamon
  • 1/2 tsp nutmeg
  • 1/4 tsp sea salt for a garnish

This is beyond easy, no excuses:

After dates are finished soaking, chuck everything into a food processor, and blend until smooth. Mine went for probably about 3-4 minutes, or until the “dough” forms a bit of a ball. If needed, add a little bit of water (I didn’t and mine stay together fine). Here’s where you get to play with your food! Roll dough into little balls and smoosh them out into a cookie-like shape… make a crisscross pattern with a fork if you’re feeling fancy, and sprinkle with sea salt. Or leave them as balls, up to you! Store in the fridge, in a sealed container with wax paper between the layers. I let mine chill for a bit before eating—they solidify into sort of a fudgy-consistency. Soooo. Freaking. Good!

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Transitory Friday obsessions and other musings.

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Friday things!!

1. I made these cookies. Again. For the second time in a week.

2. I’m finally not sore. It took me like four days to recover from my last set of workouts Monday-Wednesday, but hey. It was worth it! (Even though that involved being in ridiculous pain trying to hand people things across the cash desk or reach my arms over my head, but whatever. Reaching and handing are clearly unnecessary activities… riiiight?).

3. It is unbelievable how many times people come into the store asking: “sooo… my friend’s aunt’s cousin had these pants…. annnd they were, umm… black… do you have them?” … Really?!

4. My car’s back shocks are currently making the noise of the van’s horn from the movie Little Miss Sunshine. You know, like MmmmEMEMMEMMRMMBmmmbbBMBMMBMMM (that is exactly what horns sound like, by the way) everyyyyy time I go over a bump. I think it’s time to get this looked at…

5. I find this hilarious. Courtesy of Memphis Minnie’s bbq… om nama porkaya hahahah!

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6. Errrmeerrgeerrrddd my peanut butter jar is half empty. Someone rescue me.

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7. Kombucha. With chia. I’m obsessed.

8. I also made grilled pineapple and black bean quesadillas, with avocado and mango chutney. They were a winner, so you get a picture. I’m too lazy to post what barely counts for a recipe, so just chuck some pineapple on a grill pan and call it a day.

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Anyway. Without further ado, you should make these cookies! They’re stupidly easy and full of nutrients, without requiring an extensive list of ingredients or weird kitchen appliances. One bowl, one spoon, and maybe your food processor. Easy money. Gluten free+ lower in sugar+ higher in protein+ whole grain+ antioxidants from the chia+ mental well being from overall deliciousness= happy human.

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Absurdly Simple Peanut Butter-Chia Cookies

Yet another pb cookie recipe, I know I know, but hey. You can NEVER have too many peanut butter cookie recipes in my book. PB+chia is totally a power couple! Especially easy ones you can whip up when you desperately need a cookie. The recipe is ever so slightly modified from Cooking Uncorked, here! I got 15 cookies out of mine–you could easily have more if you made them smaller (though why you would ever do a thing like that is beyond me).

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Lezzzz do eeet:

  • 1 c oat flour (I pulverize a cup of oats in my food processor until fine)*
  • 1/3 c rolled oats*
  • scant 1/4 c brown sugar
  • 1.25 tsp baking soda
  • 1 tbsp chia seeds
  • 1 c organic chunky peanut butter
  • 6 tbsp unsweetened applesauce
  • 1 tsp vanilla extract
  • 1/4 c chocolate chips

*gluten free if needed for a gf cookie

Preheat the oven to 350 and rustle up a cookie sheet.

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Process oats into flour, if needed. Combine dry ingredients… in a bowl. Chuck in everything else. Lick spoon and pb-measuring cup. Ensure that there is no smidge of peanut butter left uneaten (heaven forbid). Clean spoon. Use your well defined and nicely muscled biceps to stir everything together. Drop by heapingish tablespoons onto the cookie sheet. Lick spoon, lick bowl. Bake cookies for 7-8 minutes, depending on how hot your oven is! Let cool for a minute or two on the cookie sheet, then move to a cooling rack (or your mouth).

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