refined sugar free – Page 22 – Wait…are those…cookies?!

November 23, 2014November 23, 2014

BlondieHenge

HOmg these are good.

They’re like giant dense, chewy hunks of almondy goodness… almond butter and almond flour and… well actually that’s really all I need, isn’t it?? I swear, nuts are a food group for me. Probably because I AM nuts. Or something.

How is it already pretty much Thanksgiving?! Where did the last two months go?? This is absurd. I would like October back, please.

But actually… I like Christmas music. And coniferous trees in my living room. So I guess we can keep this moment of now where it currently is…

And in the meantime, I’ll eat these, thank you very much.

Whoever told you playing with you food wasn’t socially acceptable is lame because it’s FUN! Who doesn’t want to make Stonehenge out of tiny bits of almond butter blondie!? I speak from experience. You should really try it sometime. Extra points for squatting on the floor because the light is better down there, and that way your cat can investigate and decide that what you’re doing is acceptable. They do that, you know. But look!!! There are trilithons and uprights and lintels in my blondie henge. Which, by the way, is lots more fun than Stonehenge because you can play deity for a bit and then EAT YOUR HENGE!! What a revolutionary concept.

Also this kind of reminds me a lot of fifth grade when we studied colonial America and made shops out of shoeboxes. Not sure really why making an henge out of blondie bits as a 24 year old reminds me of fifth grade, but whatever. It’s fun walk down memory lane. Anyway… I chose the apothecary, since they fascinated me with all the little jars of interesting things. And being the architect’s daughter that I am, I cut up bits of clear plastic tubing (no doubt obtained on an educational trip with said architect to Ace hardware to learn about practical things) into ‘jars’ and filled them all up with spices and mysterious things, and hot glued them all to the back shelves of the box-shop. It smelled… AMAZING. Maybe that is where my early love of spices came from?? Anyway. This has nothing to do with blondies or henges but there you go. Welcome to my brain box, it’s weird in here.

Make blondie henges. Just trust me. Your inner child (or maybe your outer child because really, who wants to grow up?! It’s overrated) will thank you.

Also blondie henges are delicious. They also do double duty by satisfying my eternally curious and historically inclined nature.

Happy Almost Thanksgiving!

Ps. Furry friends are the absolute best snuggle buddies, especially when you’re wrapped in their favorite blanket.

Almond Butter Blondie Bars

Grain free, gluten free, vegan, and refined sugar free! Those are my current four favorite things about treats these days (especially the refined sugar free bit). They’re super easy to whip up and don’t bake for very long, both plusses for me. I’m definitely not against spending quality time in the kitchen, but there also time when you need a treat like yesterday and a quick baking time is essential. This recipe makes very tall bars in an 8 by 8 pan—anywhere from 9 to a zillion bitty bits of Blondie Henge depending on how you slice em. Recipe adapted from A Clean Bake, here!

3.5 c almond flour
scant 1/2 c coconut flour
1/2 tsp fine sea salt
1 tsp baking soda
1 c roasted unsalted almond butter
2 flax eggs (2 tbsp ground flaxseed+6 tbsp water)
1 tsp vanilla extract
1/3 c pure maple syrup
4 tbsp unsweetened almond milk
1/3 c extra dark chocolate chips

Preheat the oven to 350, and lightly grease an 8 by 8 pan. Make your flax egg by combining flax and water, and set it aside to gel for about 5 minutes.

In a large bowl, whisk together almond flour, coconut flour (sift it if it’s lumpy, nothing ruder than lumps of coconut flour in baked goods), sea salt, and baking soda. In a smaller bowl, stir together almond butter, gelled flax egg, vanilla, maple, and almond milk. Add wet into dry, add chocolate chips, and stir until everything is combined. The dough is thick—I added an extra splash of almond milk when I stirred everything together, which is totally fine but don’t go overboard (I used only about a tbsp extra). Spread the batter into the prepared pan (I found a silicone spatula to work well for this). Sling the pan into the oven, and bake for 13-14 minutes (mine was perfect at 14). There might be some moist crumbs on the tester, but they should be a little densey-fudgy. Let cool before slicing, or else they’ll get crumbly. These are my favorite right out of the fridge, since the cold kind of solidifies their chewy denseness. Store any leftovers in the fridge (I usually just leave them in the pan and cover it with foil).

November 17, 2014

Hello, I’m a stressball and this is what I ate last week

Here we go again with one of those hopefully-not-too-often posts of, “hello, I’ve been super stressed and super busy and have therefore not cooked often enough for my liking but I love my bloglet and invisible internet friends and I can’t abandon them sooooo… here is a post of ‘this that and the other thing’ I’ve eaten recently…”

Just bear with me. I’m still recovering from taking the GRE, which was the test equivalent of something sucking out your soul and dancing on it. Four hours staring at a computer screen, testing. And testing. And testing. Ewww. Good thing I face planted into THIS afterwards.

All I wanted was carbs and cheese. Literally.

Thank you, Zachary’s, for saving my soul. Seriously though, what a horrible thing to make people do. Ugh. Just thinking about it is making me want pizza again from the horrible stressyness of it all. But actually I just love Zachary’s pizza anyway so that’s not too hard of a sell.. mmmkmovingon!

Also this. Oops. But I shared, don’t worry.

And then of course Jill and I had our annual monthly-ish cooking extravaganza. So delicious beet caviar happened {adapted from this recipe here}, like this {our iteration had less garlic, used yogurt, and more lemon juice}:

And then mmmm spaghetti squash with chard and chickpeas {recipe adapted only slightly from here}:

And then we baked. I mean, of course. What else would we do?!

Cookies. Vegan, gluten free, refined sugar free. Like this, and found here:

Note scientific fork division of chocolate chip filled cookies and carob chip filled cookies. It’s SCIENCE.

And then cake. Pumpkin pecan with pumpkin seed crumble. Vegan, gluten free and refined sugar free, but I have to say it’s delicious with ice cream (because really, what isn’t). Recipe was as is, minus the addition of flax, here.

And also apparently my dresser looks like an iSpy page. Which is totally fine with me… it makes hunting for appropriate jewelry so much more fun. No surprise my nickname is Little Magpie….

i spy, anyone??

November 4, 2014

Welcome to the inside of my brain box: Part 1. Useless math facts

Mo’ cookies! Because cookies.

Also because imminent GRE equals some amount of stress-baking. Or maybe a lot of stress-cooking. Or maybe both… not that I’m admitting to anything here. Definitely not.

Basically I just want to take this stupid thing and be done. Like, now. Not in five days but NOW so it can get out of my head and I can have my brain space back. Ommm. Five more days. Ommm….

I’m to that lovely point where your brain simply cannot take in any more information, no matter how hard you study and try to cram it in there. So I did what I do best and made soup and cookies and vegan lentil enchiladas and went to yoga and jazzercise and and took a study break. And now I’m blogging. Because there is no more information that wants to go into my brain. I will be SUCH a happy camper this coming Monday at five pm when I land on College Ave. and face plant into a Zachary’s pizza [all my East Bay peeps, you know why this is such a fantastic idea]. Ahhhh. Post GRE pizza nirvana.

But anyway. Until then I am trapped in my head with useless math facts. So cookies. Because the math involved in making 3/4 of a recipe of cookies is WAY more fun than weighted averages. And “real life” (ha) word problems. Also lovely, that this batch makes roughly 19 cookies, which is the exact number that I’m really good at cramming onto a cookie sheet. Why, you ask? I did this because a) I’m lazy and b) I had to study so I could only procrastinate by cookie baking for so long. Also I apparently developed an aversion to using more than one cookie sheet when I was living in Salem with Kira and we only had one, and rotating batches was too annoying. So maybe that’s where this comes from?! Ingrained behavior. And laziness. And studying. Let’s not forget that…

The wise mistress of the otherworldly cat realm who hangs around me says… ‘Sit in your favorite blanket and eat cookies and I will sit on you. Because it’s actually my blanket and you are actually my human’. And then she smiles at me, like the darling cute thing that she is:

And I probably take her advice and eat cookies with her on my lap. Because life and studying are more more appealing when there are cookies and smiling cats.

Almond Butter Gingerbread Cookies

Gluten free, grain free, refined sugar free [date sweetened!], and vegan! These cookies are sweetened with dates and molasses—both nutrient-dense natural sweeteners. They’re full of healthy fats from the almond butter, and good fiber from coconut flour. Go ahead and indulge with glee! Yield: 19.

1 c roasted, unsalted almond butter
3 tbsp molasses
2 tbsp ground flaxseed+6 tbsp water [2 flax eggs]
3/4 c pitted dates, packed [soaked if needed]
1 tsp vanilla extract
1 tbsp freshly grated ginger
1/4 c coconut flour [sifted if lumpy]
1 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp ground ginger
1 tsp cinnamon
1/4 tsp allspice
scant 1/2 tsp fine sea salt
a twist or two of fresh black pepper
1/4 c extra dark chocolate chips

In the bowl of a food processor, process soaked dates with a bit of their soaking water (only about a tbsp or two) until a mostly smooth, slightly chunky paste forms. Set aside. In a small bowl, stir together 2 tbsp flax eggs and 6 tbsp water; let sit aside to gel.

Preheat the oven to 350 and line a baking sheet (or two if you’re not like me) with parchment paper. In a large bowl, whisk together almond butter, molasses, gelled flax egg, date paste, vanilla, and grated ginger until smooth and incorporated. In a separate, smaller bowl, whisk together coconut flour, baking soda, ground ginger, cinnamon, allspice, sea salt, and pepper. Add dry into wet, toss in chocolate chips with reckless abandon, and stir until the dough is combined and all the dry ingredients are incorporated. Drop the dough by the tablespoonful onto the prepared cookie sheet (it’s sticky, so prepare to eat leftover sticky on your person). Cram all 19 cookies onto a sheet if you’re feeling adventurous. Pop them into the oven for at least 12 minutes—they will start to form a chewy crust on the outside, but we need the inside to be NOT mushy. I checked mine at 12, then baked them for another 4 minutes, checking at the two minute mark. They should be not too squishy on the top, with just a little give and a chewy crust on the outside.

Let them cool on the cookie sheet before removing them to a cooling rack—they’re soft when they’re warm! Let cool completely and store in an airtight container in the fridge for chewy-fudgy cookies, or on the counter in an airtight container for soft cookies.

October 30, 2014

Squash Wrestling Champ

You don’t even want to know my struggles yesterday involving a kabocha squash.

Well…

Maybe you do. They’re kind of funny.

Let me just preface this with a simple suggestion. Don’t ever ever ever go to jazzercise on circuit day and then expect to be able to wrestle open a kabocha squash for roasting purposes an hour later. Just don’t. It will end badly, with the knife stuck in the squash and your arms aching. Also that weird spot where your arm meets your body?? You know, not your armpit but in front of it?? Yeah. That is impossibly sore too, which means picking up squashes and putting them in the oven (as well as taking the heavy bottom of the food processor down from the ridiculous high place that it’s stored in), not to mention cutting them open, rather difficult. I FINALLY got that squash cut in half (a little unevenly but don’t you judge me) after quite the struggle. We’re talking two hands on the knife, full body weight bearing down on the stupid thing trying to make things happen. Safely, naturally. Those squash don’t give up easily, let me tell you…

I think I might actually be sore-er today due to squash wrestling yesterday. For reals.

Also I made so many things yesterday!! Day off + too much studying+ in between forcing myself to study + fall + pumpkin = bopping around in the kitchen all day! Which I love. Hello, kale chips out of the dehydrator, roasted and curried kabocha squash soup, and gluten free, vegan, date sweetened pumpkin cookies!!

Aside from all that, I have some other pretty pictures of stuff [food. obvs]:

Darling skillet brownie for two! Paleo, gluten free, vegan. From this:

To this!! Oops.

And cranberries! Hi Fall, I love you.

This soup is delicious. And I love kabocha squash (minus the difficulties of getting them open) for their bright orange color and sweet flavor. I actually like them better than butternut—there’s something about the flavor of the kabochas that is richer, or more caramelized? Anyway. They’re easy to roast—toss them in the oven (halved) on a lightly greased baking sheet for about 45 minutes, until they can be pierced with a fork easily. Take them out, flip them over and let them cool off… then scoop all that pureed goodness out and toss it in some soup. Or something. Like this:

Roasted and Curried Kabocha Squash Soup

Yield: a vat. I used this recipe from My Darling Vegan, but obviously used a roasted kabocha squash instead of pumpkin. I reduced the garlic to 1 clove but went heavy handed on the cumin and curry powder, and I blended in all of the cashew creme instead of saving some for topping. Delicious all around, I wouldn’t change a thing!

And then obviously you need some beta carotene to go with your beta carotene… and some cookies to follow up that soup sooooo…..

THESE happened. Obviously.

Date Sweetened Pumpkin Cookies

Vegan, gluten free, and refined sugar free! These cookies are soft, but not cakey. They’re oaty, pumpkiny and spicy—everything you want in a fall cookie. I made 3/4 of the recipe (don’t even ask) for a yield of 22. Recipe adapted from Tasty Yummies, here! They do tend to soften as they sit, so I like to store mine in the fridge in an airtight container.

1 c pitted dates, soaked in near-boiling water for at least 10 minutes
1 flax egg (1 tbsp ground flaxseed+ 3 tbsp water)
1.5 c almond flour
3/4 tsp baking powder
3/4 tsp baking soda
heaping 1/4 tsp fine sea salt
heaping tsp cinnamon
1/2 tsp nutmeg
1/4 c avocado oil
scant 1 c pure pumpkin puree
1 tsp vanilla
1.5 c rolled oats
1/4 c extra dark chocolate chips

Preheat the oven to 350, and line a baking sheet or two with parchment paper.

In a food processor, make date paste out of your soaking dates. Chuck em all in there with a little bit of water and whizz whizz whizz until it’s mostly smooth. This isn’t an exact science and I love chunks of dates in my cookies so I don’t go crazy trying to get it to smooth out. Set aside. Make your flax egg by combining flax and water in a small bowl, and set that aside as well.

In a large bowl, whisk together almond flour, baking soda, baking powder, salt, cinnamon, and nutmeg. In a slightly smaller bowl, whisk together oil, pumpkin, vanilla and gelled flax egg. Stir wet into dry, add in oats and chocolate chips, and stir until combined. Drop by large tablespoons onto the prepared baking sheet, flattening them slightly and rounding the edges if you like perfect looking cookies (I usually opt for the rustic variety). Bake for 18-20 minutes, until the tops are lightly browned and slightly firm. Let cookies cool on the cookie sheet for at least 3-4 minutes before moving them (they’re soft, be careful!). Let cool completely on a cooling rack and store in an airtight container in the fridge.

October 22, 2014

I’ll have all the fall things, puhleez

I feel a little neglectful of my bloglet but uggghh I’ve been buried under endless math flashcards and GRE study. Eeew ew ew. My free time from now until November 10th is non existent and has been replaced by studying math that I haven’t needed to know since high school. No big deal, I’ll just re-learn how to FOIL because that is SO USEFUL. Not.

But. That is off my chest now and I can think about all the fun things happening right now like boots and scarves and FALL and pumpkin and ginger and baking and cold, snappy air!! AND grilled cheese festivals with E. WITH UNLIMITED GRILLED CHEESE. We were very, very happy. Obviously.

But actually I love fall because baking becomes legit again. Who wants to turn the oven on when it’s hot in the summer?! I make the sacrifice but really I hate it. It’s much more fun when it’s chilly out and I get to heat up the kitchen while I putter around. Putter putter putter. What a great word.

Even Jessie gets in on the fall sunbathing. The sun feels sooo much better when it’s brisk out.

Side note: this was my breakfast. Sometimes I amaze even myself.

And all I want is ginger. And pumpkin. And fall-spiced things. So I made two kinds of pumpkin bread in one week.

And then I made these: Almond Butter ginger cookies that were amaaaazing… they got eaten pretty much too fast to take decent pictures.

And then not even a week later I made these: Molasses Ginger Cookies [Chewy, dense, and spicy. Everything a fall cookie should be]

Can someone save me from myself, please??

But actually don’t. Just hang around so I can feed you things and make more things. Okay? Okay.

Molasses Ginger Cookies

Makes a nice small batch of about 9 cookies. Vegan, gluten and grain free, refined sugar free, and full of healthy fats and fall spices. The recipe is only slightly adapted from the Roasted Root, here! Also it probably only took me a max of 10 minutes to have these in the oven and the dishes washed. And then they only bake for about 8 minutes so really, there is nooo excuse not to make them!

1.25 c almond meal
1/2 tsp baking powder
1/4 tsp baking soda
1 heaping tsp ground cinnamon
1/2 tsp ground nutmeg
1/8 tsp ground cloves
2 heaping tsp fresh ginger, grated
2 tbsp molasses
1 tsp vanilla
2 tbsp coconut oil, melted

Preheat the oven to 350 and line a baking sheet with parchment paper.

In a bigish bowl, whisk together almond meal, baking soda and powder, cinnamon, nutmeg, cloves and freshly grated ginger. Stir in molasses, vanilla, and melted coconut oil. Roll into a roughly ball-like shape and drop by the tablespoonful onto the cookie sheet, flattening the cookies slightly. Bake for 8-10 minutes, until lightly browned at the edges. The tops will still feel a teeny bit soft, so let them cool on the cookie sheet for a few minutes before removing them to a cooling rack to cool completely.

October 16, 2014

Ready, set… PUMPKIN

Pumpkin!! And stuff. But actually… mostly just pumpkin.

Because the air finally smells different, the wind is cooler, scarves are necessary, and the leaves are starting to change and fall. This is my FAVORITE time of year, especially since it gives me an excuse to wear an excessive amount of scarves and boots and eat mass amounts of pumpkin. Also fall = flannels, hot tea, holidays, and eatingcookingeatingbakingeating.

The other day/night it was really fallish weather here, so I was cooking with the windows open so I could smell the air at every opportunity. It didn’t hurt that the neighbors had a wood fire going somewhere, and obviously that smelled delicious.

And the best part of all this means I can use pumpkin for baking with reckless abandon. Which I’ve already started doing. Two pumpkin breads in less than a week? Oh yeah. Easy money. Bring on endless cans of squash puree, and I will speedily dispatch them. Ooooh I love this season!

Also. Food is more fun when it’s colorful, don’t you think?

Apparently everything I eat from now on is going to be orange. A spanish tortilla happened last night and this is partly what went in it. Ooooorange!!! Ha.

This bread is delicious—light, but densely moist (let’s stick to hydrated, mmk?) and spiced. It’s grain free, gluten free, vegan, and refined sugar free [they’re sweetened only with dates!], so there are no excuses not to enjoy. It’s also full of healthy fats and good squash-carbs, as well as enormous amounts of Vitamin A and beta carotene. Wheeee!

Pumpkin-Almond Butter Bread

Grain free, gluten free, vegan, refined sugar free. It might also be paleo, but I’m not the authority on that business. Makes 1 loaf or an 8 by 8 pan (I used the latter, so the cook time below reflects that. Add at least 10 minutes for a loaf pan and check as needed). Recipe inspired and heavily adapted from the Roasted Root, here!

1 c pure pumpkin puree
1 c unsalted almond butter
2 tsp vanilla extract
1 flax egg (1 tbsp flaxseed meal+3 tbsp water; let sit for 5 minutes)
1 c pitted dates, soaked if needed
1.5 tsp cinnamon
1/4 tsp allspice
1/4 tsp ground ginger
1/4 tsp fine sea salt
1 tbsp baking powder
1.5 tbsp coconut flour
3 tbsp extra dark chocolate chips

Lightly grease an 8 by 8 inch pan and preheat the oven to 350.

If your dates are super hard, soak them in near-boiling water for about 10 minutes. Drain nearly all the water out, but reserve about a tablespoon or two. Puree the dates and reserved water in a food processor until mostly smooth, then set aside. Make flax egg, and set it aside as well to gel.

In a large bowl, whisk together pumpkin, almond butter, vanilla extract, and flax egg, then stir in the date paste. In a smaller bowl, whisk together cinnamon, allspice, ginger, sea salt, baking powder, and coconut flour. Toss dry into wet, add chocolate chips, and stir until everything is just combined. Scoop all that goodness out into your prepared pan, smooth the top, and bake for 35-37 minutes, or until a tester comes out clean. The top should spring back just slightly when touched.

Let cool in the pan for about 10-15 minutes, then run a knife around the pan, top the pan with a cooling rack, and CAREFULLY (it’s delicate!) invert the bread onto the cooling rack to cool completely (you don’t have to flip it back over unless you want to…). Once it’s completely cool, I store it back in the pan I baked it in. Leftovers only lasted a day in my house, and I recommend storing this one in the fridge.

October 7, 2014October 8, 2014

Peat bogs and holey cakes

Ohhhh I know…

It’s a CAKE!

[There’s a hole in this cake…]

But… I fixed it!

There is now a hole in this cake and alcohol as well. Because… why not?? Also because… Happy Belated, Vacuum Vati! He has this penchant for drinking scotch out of these special glasses (and I can tell what he’s had because it’s either scotch or graham crackers with milk. That’s random, you say…. but actually there is a method to his madness. The wide mouthed glasses let the scotch breathe properly and also are the appropriate width for graham cracker dippage). Actually it’s really fun to just tell him I know exactly what he’s been drinking and have him be slightly baffled as to how I know. Muahhaha. Exemplary powers of observation, that’s what that is. And mildly hilarious to watch him drink scotch and carefully put a coaster over the top of the aforementioned wide mouth glass to discourage escaping peat-boggishness. Because my mom rightfully dislikes the peat bog smell that emanates from certain bottles of superior scotch. He has a special peat-bog-discouraging coaster. It’s hilarious and I love it.

And actually I essayed a teeny sip of scotch today and it was DISGUSTING. I coughed for days. It burns all the way down. BUT. Then you put it in chocolate cake. With coconut sugar. And chocolate. And five spice. And CARAMEL and ohmygod is it actually delicious. I mean really, how is cake NOT delicious. But this one is especially good.

Many happy returns, Vacuum Vati! So pleased you like your peat-bog-chocoalte-caramel decadence. Because everyone deserves a little indulgence on their birthday!

Also ps: I was in Texas visiting fam for the last several weeks and I will put up some pictures eventually probably if they’ll ever load. So cake first, vacay second. I’m sure you’re just sitting on the edge of your chair waiting with bated breath…

Chocolate Scotch Cake with Whiskey Caramel Glaze

Recipe adapted from Love and Olive Oil, here! Recipe yields a normal sized bundt cake. Refined sugar free (though it IS sweet, as per VV’s request), whole wheat, and healthy fats from the avocado oil. So it’s good for you! Uh. No. But indulge accordingly, because that’s what birthdays are for! Don’t worry–it’s not overly scotch-y, either. I like it quite a bit and I don’t even like scotch. It’s like chocolate cake that is deeper and richer than your average fair.

Let’s get our cake on:

1.5 c coconut sugar
2 c whole wheat pastry flour
3/4 c unsweetened cocoa powder, sifted
2 tsp baking soda
1 tsp baking powder
1 tsp sea salt
1/2 tsp five spice
1 c lowfat buttermilk
2 eggs
1/2 c avocado oil
2 tsp vanilla extract
3/4 c warm water
1/4 (or closer to 1/3… I went heavy handed) c good quality Scotch whiskey [preferably one that smells less like a peat bog]
1/2 c extra dark chocolate chips

For the caramel:

1 c coconut sugar
pinch of cream of tartar
1/4 c water
2/3 c heavy cream
1 tbsp salted butter
2 tbsp Scotch whiskey

Get yo’ cake on:

Preheat the oven to 350, and grease the living daylights out of a bundt pan. Standard bundt size is fine {I use coconut oil for greasing}. Combine 1 tbsp flour+1 tbsp cocoa powder, and flour the inside of the pan, tapping out all the excess.

In a large bowl, whisk together sugar, flour, sifted cocoa, baking powder+soda, salt, and five spice until combined. In a separate bowl, whisk together buttermilk, eggs, avocado oil, and vanilla. Pour wet into dry, and use an electric mixer to beat until just combined. Add water and scotch, and continue mixing until just barely incorporated (don’t over mix, puhhleeez). Stir in the chocolate chips, and pour into the prepared pan. Bake for 50-55 minutes, until a tester inserted into the fat part of the cake comes out clean. Let cool on a rack in the pan until cool enough to handle, then flip out and cool completely (the cake, not you. I know the cake is fabby but don’t flip out. You can eat it… soon!!).

While the cake is baking, make the caramel! In a high-sided sauce pan over medium-high heat, add sugar and cream of tartar. Pour water around the edges and bring to a boil, then cover and let sit for 2 minutes (the steam melts the sugar evenly). Uncover, and boil for a few minutes more, until frothy. It should NOT smell burnt, just delicious. Remove from heat, whisk in cream and butter until the lumps are gone (carefully, it can splatter). Return to heat and whisk a few minutes more until smooth. Remove from heat again, and cool in a heat proof container until ready to use, preferably an hour or two to let it thicken.

Pour about half the glaze over the cooled cake once you’re ready to serve! Then slice away and drizzle mooooore caramel over the individual slices because why not?? Because caramel, that’s why. Eat immediately. Store in an airtight container in the fridge for longer cake preservation… if you’re crazy enough to have leftovers.

September 11, 2014

Just for laughs, guess how many jars of nut butter I have…

Guys. My songza playlist is SPOT ON tonight. Actually it’s so perfect it’s frightening. I got a bunch of funk up in here, perfect for a Thursday-almost-Friday-weekend-time.

Or let’s be real.

Funk is perfect ALL the time. Fact.

Just like these.

Welcome to end-of-summer-I-have-so-much-zucchini-someone-help. Or actually don’t. Really actually give me ALL YOUR SQUASH so I can make this bread over and over and over.

Because the whole pan was gone in pretty much four hours and there were only three of us.

And I really don’t feel like I got a justifiably large amount. So obviously this has to happen again. I have a question to pose to you: Is baking a bread out of nut butter and then putting more nut butter on your bread redundant?? Because that’s basically the story of my existence. I don’t even want to know how much nut butter I consume on average (thank you, GRE studies, for immediately making me think of mean, median and mode. No, I will NOT be calculating the ‘real life word problem’ of my nut butter eating. Just… no.) Do you know how many jars of nut butter are in the fridge right now? I bet you can’t even guess.

…

SEVEN.

And that’s not including the coconut butter in the cupboard (no need to refrigerate that sucker). I think I have a problem…

So make that eight different types of nut butter. There are two types of peanut butter. And two types of almond butter. And a few medleys. And some sunflower butter… oh god.

Um okay so new subject.

Bees!!! Hooray for new jobs and local bees!! Welcome to my morning:

If you want some, you know where to find me!

And you know what local honey would be amazing on??

THESE BARS.

They’re freaking fantastic. They’re even good by themselves!! Though obviously superior with a smear of extra nut butter (obvi NOT the nut butter you used to make them, because how boring. Don’t you have six other choices to pick from?!). Super fast to whip up, which is basically as close to instant gratification as you can get with baking biz.

Side note: Playlist is reading my mind. “don’t stop till you get enough”… nut butter?! Right on, Michael, you are soooo right.

Anyway. Bars. Eat yo’ veggies! In something that is grain free, gluten free, refined sugar free, and full of healthy fats and fiber and all that good stuff! And they taste kind of like gingerbread?! Which is baffling considering there is no ginger to be found in them. Whatever. They’re delicious and I didn’t eat enough last time sooooo…. does someone have any extra zucchini lying around they want to chuck my way? Puhhleeez??

Almond Butter Zucchini Bread

Recipe only a teeny bit adapted from Hummusapien, here! It was so perfect I didn’t want to futz too much, though next time I might try them with a flax egg just for funzies. Gluten free, grain free, flour free. Paleo, refined sugar free, healthy fats, good source of fiber and sneaky veggies! Makes about 9 good sized bars in an 8 by 8 pan.

3/4 c almond butter [mine was roasted and very lightly salted]
1 giant zucchini, grated [1 heaping c shredded zucchini]
1 egg
1/8 c pure maple syrup
1/8 c raw coconut nectar
1 tsp vanilla extract
3/4 tsp baking soda
2 tsp cinnamon
1/2 tsp nutmeg
1/4 tsp fine sea salt [adjust accordingly if your almond butter is salty]
1/4 c extra dark chocolate chips

Preheat oven to 350, and lightly grease an 8 by 8 baking pan with coconut oil or whatever your thing of choice is.

In a largeish/mediumish bowl thing, combine almond butter, egg, maple, coconut nectar, and vanilla. Whisk together until combined. Add in baking soda, cinnamon, nutmeg, and sea salt and whisk all that goodness in too. Stir in zucchini and chocolate chips until combined. Pour batter into the prepared pan, and bake for just about 30 minutes, until a tester comes out clean.

Let cool for a few, then flip out onto a cooling rack. I store it in the original baking pan after it’s fully cooled, with foil over the top in the fridge (Not like I needed to since it all disappeared in about thirty seconds anyway, but you know…). Leftovers keep for… I have no idea. I didn’t have any.

August 22, 2014September 25, 2014

Green cookies. Because, obviously.

Guess WHAT?!

I made cookies. And they’re GREEN!! Muahahah. Like you’re even a tiny bit surprised by this? Nope, I didn’t think so.

But really. I’m studying for the GRE because I have to and it’s SUPER lame (because let’s be honest, who actually uses the math garbage that they put on there after high school?! That’s right, NO ONE. Remind me again why I have to re-learn quadratics and functions and wait, these are of no use in my everyday life, moving on). So to make my studying that much less icky I made myself green cookies!! Green things always make me feel better.

I know this is horribly overexposed but I think it’s funny because the cookie looks like it’s levitating…. ooOOOooooOOOOoOooOo

Besides, these are really aggressively green. Artificial food coloring crap can take a backseat because this is soooo much more fun. Wouldn’t you rather the color in your food come from natural fun reactions?! This is what happens when baking soda/powder and the chlorophyll from sunflower seeds have a party in your cookies. When they cool, they turn green!! I like to refrigerate them to speed this along (besides I’m weird and I also like cold cookies)… and if you can refrain from eating them all at once (good luck), they get even greener the next day [the photos in this blog show them in varying states of green-ness… the ones on the blue plate are the next day after spending all night in the fridge].

In addition to making green cookies, I did a number of other fun and delicious things…

bread at the beach with the boy… what more do you want?

Tea sandwiches. Because HIGH TEA!!! Crumpets!! And scones!! And no crusts!!

And also creamy coconut buckwheat with turmeric-curry-cinnamon roasted chickpeas. Crappy photos but soooo delicious. I accidentally permanently stained a cookie sheet yellow, thanks turmeric.

And also this. Frozen pb-banana ‘ice cream’ with a ridiculously good walnut-date-cinnamon-oat crumble [1/2 c raw walnuts, 1/2 c pitted dates, 2 tbsp almond butter+ pinch of sea salt+1/2 c rolled oats+1/2 tsp cinnamon+1 tsp vanilla spun through a food processor]. I couldn’t stop eating it, mildly problematic except not because delicious.

Oh. One more thing. Are variables delicious? Last I checked, no. These cookies on the other hand? Absolutely yes.

See? Real food fun. Imminently more useful than bothersome little equations and silly variables.

I would much rather have green cookies than remember how to correctly diagram a factor tree, thanks.

Sunflower Seed Butter Cookies

Grain free, gluten free, vegan, refined sugar free. Paleo? Maybs? GREEN! Full of healthy fats and good fiber. I made a half batch and ended up with seven cookies because I mistakenly thought the 1/3 c was a 1/4 c measuring cup…oops. I wasn’t sorry, it meant I got an extra cookie out of the bunch. I’ll include the full recipe here, for a yield of an even dozen. Recipe lightly adapted from Against All Grain, here!

2 tbsp ground flaxseed
4 tbsp water
1/2 c unsweetened sunbutter (mine is roasted, unsalted)
6 dates, pitted
1/2 c unsweetened applesauce
1 tsp vanilla extract
3/4 tsp apple cider vinegar
1/2 c shredded unsweetened coconut
1/4 c coconut flour
1 tsp cinnamon
1 tsp baking soda
1/3 c dark chocolate chips

Preheat the oven to 350 and line a baking sheet with parchment paper.

In a small bowl, combine flax and water and set aside to gel. If your dates aren’t super squishy and soft, soak them in hot/near boiling water for a few minutes—I usually do this anyway so my food processor doesn’t complain as much. In your food processor, combine sun butter, dates, and applesauce and pulse until smooth. Add in vanilla, vinegar, and flax egg, and process until combined (I left a few chunks of date in mine, but it’s up to you). Add in coconut, coconut flour, cinnamon, and baking soda, processing until everything is fully combined. Take out the blade and stir in the chocolate chips.

Drop by rounded tablespoonful onto the prepared baking sheet, smoothing the edges with your fingers if you want (though I kind of like the craggy rustic look). Bake for 15 minutes. Let cool on the sheet for a few, then remove to a rack to cool further. They’ll start turning green once they start cooling, but they get to be a deeper green after about 2 hours. The next day they’re even better! Store in an airtight container in the fridge (I like plastic for these, glass makes them soft).

August 13, 2014

There is drool on my keyboard

Before I get into all the sweets nonsense… this was this morning’s harvest. I love love love having growing things in my backyard!! The baby strawberries went into buckwheat cereal alongside their pallies blueberries and kale and zucchini and carrots and coconut and sun butter and chia+hemp seeds and all the other ridiculous things I put in my breakfast cereals… But anyway.

I warned you about the sweets excess, no?!

Jill and I managed to whip out a batch of coconut milk ice cream with salted almond date caramel and pecans (droooool), a double batch of peanut butter coconut carob chip cookies, and a grain free raspberry polenta cake. In 4 hours. Boom. And we ate lunch in there somewhere, and Jill made this epic quinoa pizza crust just before I came over so that was also lunch.

But guys.

THIS ICE CREAM.

I just….

Drool.

Want.

Actually, I think this is the first time I have actually made ice cream!! I mean, I did it once at girly scout day camp, but I hardly think that counts (though I do remember it being delicious). I’ve also made it in that silly way of putting rock salt and ice in a plastic baggie and shaking cream around until it sort of resembles ice cream but HELLO that is so NOT as good as this business. This is… I have no words. Just drool.

AND. Not only that, but this ice cream is dairy free!! And gluten free!!! And quite possibly paleo?! And refined sugar free!! And vegan!!! Extra exclamation points!!! I think food allergies are super lame so here is a tummy-friendly ice cream for [nearly] everyone! YAY!

I got really excited in that last paragraph, sorry… but seriously. This ice cream.. mmmm.

ALSO ALSO ALSO!!!! I just made these amazing vegan lentil enchiladas with my friend Britt so they’re going up next. Because they’re really freakin’ amazing. Holy moly. Could it be?? Something savory?! No. Surely not. I must have hallucinated from too much ice cream…

Coconut Ice Cream with Salted Almond Date Caramel and Pecans

Recipe gratefully borrowed from Sweet Miscellany, here! I adapted the date caramel and pecans slightly to my taste. Makes about 5-6 servings, but is best the day it’s made (it starts to get a bit hard after a day or two), so go ahead and indulge with some friends. Either way, let it sit out for a few minutes (like 5) before serving–it will scoop a bit better. Gluten free, refined sugar free, paloe, vegan, and dairy free!

For the ice cream base:

2 cans full-fat, organic coconut milk
1 tsp pure vanilla extract
pinch of salt
1/2 c pure maple syrup (I use grade B, I like the flavor better in baked goods or sweets)
1 tbsp plain vodka

For the caramel:

roughly 20 good sized medjool dates, pitted (soaked if necessary)
2 heaping tbsp salted almond butter
a good pinch of sea salt
1.5 tsp pure vanilla extract
2-4 tbsp unsweetened almond milk, to thin it out a bit

For the pecans:

1 tsp coconut oil
heaping cup of pecans, chopped

Get ready to drool: In a large bowl, whisk together all of the ingredients for the base. Cover and chill in the fridge either overnight or for fourish hours.

While the base is chilling, make pecans and caramel! For the pecans, heat coconut oil in a medium skillet over medium-low heat. Toss in pecans and toast, shaking the pan occasionally. You’ll be able to smell the delicious toastiness once they get close to being done—should only be around 5 minutes after the oil is heated.

For the caramel, truck out your trusty food processor. Soak your dates in hot water to soften them if necessary. Once they’re soft, toss them into the food processor and pulse until they form a rough paste. Add in almond butter, vanilla, and sea salt, and pulse to combine. Add almond milk as necessary to thin it out a bit—you don’t want it too thin, but thick enough that it’s spreadable. Set aside when it’s to your liking.

Once the base is done chilling, bust out your ice cream maker! Jill has a really cool one.. mine is OLD school. Like, hand crank. So… we used Jill’s! Chill the insert in the freezer if needed. Toss it all in and churn according to the ice cream maker’s instructions (or if you can’t find them, like Jill and I, just use your best judgement ;). Once the ice cream gets to a ‘soft serve’ consistency—meaning that if you stick a finger in there (or a spoon, pst whatever civilized), you should be able to scoop some up without it being too runny. Stir in about 3/4 of the pecans. Once the pecans are incorporated, spread a layer of ice cream into whatever you’re storing it in (I used a tall, round container; Jill’s was flat and square–either is fine), followed by generous dollops of caramel and a sprinkle of pecans. Repeat, swirling the ice cream together with the caramel dollops, until all the ice cream and caramel (and pecans) are combined. Cover and freeze until firm—for easier scooping, freeze until *just* firm. Let sit out a bit before scooping!